The Worst Workout Playlist

So, now and then, I goof up my iPod playlists and something completely inappropriate comes up during my Workout. This got me to thinking -- what are the most completely demotivating, inappropriate workout songs? Here is the start of my list:

• "I Like Big Buts" or Queen's "Fat Bottom Girls" -- Both songs have great beats, but can be somewhat demotivational, I sometimes feel like I don't have to work as hard knowing that there are people who do appreciate my fat butt.
• Roberta Flack's "First Time Ever I Saw Your Face" -- Not a bad song, but the slowest paced song ever recorded. It is so slow that I think it actually goes backwards in places.
• Tom Wait's "The Piano Has Been Drinking" -- Great song, but somehow a slow song about being really really really drunk just isn't particularly conducive to a good workout.
• Counting Crow's "Colorblind" -- I love the Crows, but some of their music is very very dark -- this song in particular is so bleak if it came up at the gym I would probably put my head under a weight stack.
• REM's "Everybody Hurts" -- As most people know, REM is my favorite band ever. Except for this song. It is physically painful to listen to, and listening to it in a gym is the only thing that can make it worse.
• Celine Dion -- that horrible whiny Titanic song. The only way this would be appropriate for a gym would be if someone tied me down with leather straps and started playing this song, and the exercise was to escape the straps before I go insane.
• Neil Young's "Helpless" -- True story -- back when I went to the gym on Merritt Island I forgot my walkman one day (yes, it was that long ago) and incredulously -- this song came up over the gym's music system. To this day, with such pump-you-up lyrics as "helpless, helpless, helpless, helpless" I cannot think of a more inappropriate workout song.

What songs do you think should never be on your workout playlist? Post a comment and share!